The Amazing Disposable Woman did it again. But, this time I'm still breathing. I thought getting tossed out again would be more than I could live through. But, I'm actually starting to be ok just hours later. I've thought about it you see. I've learned and I've improved on my comphrension. In short, I picked wrong again.

You can't be in a relationship by yourself. You can't have a relationship with someone on paper or in a digital/ cyber version only. If someone who hasn't met you says he loves you, realize it's not based on anything concrete. Likely, he's putting you in some reserve file to be analyzed, inspected and perhaps acted upon in the far future. Like a time capsule. He doesn't really want you to be a part of his life in the here and now.

Also, any guy that doesn't send real birthday cards isn't going out of his way to include you in his life in other ways. If you get something physical then you can rely on getting more physical. Romance isn't a story book to be read on paper, taken out and dusted off when it's convenient. It's in the here and now and it's messy sometimes. At times it's gushy and mushy and really inconvenient. But, it's there, physically there.

Watch for guys who want a 'partnership' and then start laying out the rules. You should be in there somewhere, your rules. If you're not then it's not a partnership. If all the rules are his there isn't any space for you.

So, more lessons learned. As if I wasn't already perfect enough.

I'm Ok! I'm really going to be ok. I'm so surprised and glad. At first I thought I'd just curl up and die. But, here I am. Typing and everything. I might even go make fresh coffee and have a really great orgasm before bed. I'm free and I'm just fine! I don't have to explain myself to anyone.