I'm not a professional Domme and don't want to become one, though I admit the money is tempting. I am a freelance writer, I live in Ontario, Canada and I like finding new and creative, wicked ways to play with boys. Not children, just those little men who think they would like nothing better than to be tied up and at the mercy of a good woman. I am a good woman. Just ask my family and friends, they all say I am nice, some even go as far as sweet. It isn't my ambition to be the nice one. I'm okay with it. The world could use a bit more nice.

I'm also the one who writes about sex, an actual sex blogger and sex column writer in the recent past. My family didn't approve. I'm kind of surprised I told them. But, honesty just makes life less complicated in the long run and less complicated is a really nice thing.

If you ever heard of a site called BackWash (no longer online), you already know me. I wrote there for years. On the red (adult) side my column was Bait and Switch. I wrote fiction and non-fiction as new and wicked ideas occurred to me. I wrote a newsletter too. Right now I can't remember what I called it, but it was clever. I like clever things.

I'm not well experienced in BDSM. That nice girl thing again, I married the first man I had sex with. We were friends a long time and now we are divorced and living far apart and friendly because that's what nice girls do once they've picked themselves up again. I dated a bit since then but nothing has worked out. I've never been the sort of woman who can settle for a quick screw, I want more. As much as I like to explore and learn new things, I want to do all that with someone I can still wake up to the next day, the next week and for all the wrinkles to come.

I have liked BDSM for more years than I care to count. It started before I had boobs. I don't need to give a detailed list of my wicked ways here. I will be posting about my ideas, illustrations which I find or create myself and whatever is going on with my socializing/ fraternizing with boys. At this time I have been getting to know a man in Toronto. Email only, so far. But, he seems sincere, has a personality and can talk about things which have nothing to do with sex or BDSM.

A blog network is a group of people writing together to cover a set of topics all as part of the same larger group.

• Some blog networks are writers with their own unique blogs, only connected through the network as a way of building a community, such as 9Rules.
• Another kind of network is more like an ezine where the writers post to one site, like Blogging Tips, Smashing Magazine, or Salon.com. There are also networks like this based on locations like FreshDaily.ca, a Canadian blog network with sites for Toronto, Vancouver and Montreal.
• Most blog networks are individual niche blogs all formatted and maintained as per the network standards and rules. Examples of this kind of blog network are: Suite101, About.com, Creative Weblogging, Wired Blogs, LockerGnome, WritersWriteInc, DailyPixel, BellaOnline, B5 Media, Weblogs Inc. .

That third type of blog network is the easiest to spot and fairly easy to join and be accepted as a writer. Advantages to being in a blog network like this, versus DIY (doing it all yourself) is having technical support, an ad network already set up and promotion from the network (as it promotes itself and your blog among others).

One disadvantage is having to follow the rules set out by the network. You may not always like how they do things. Some networks will listen to your ideas for change, many do not. You may have to run more ads than you would like to. Some blog networks will have your written content show up under a lot of ads, to the point where readers have to scroll down to find any content at all. (I don't highly recommend a network that does this).

Also, you may be restricted in how you can use the content you write for the network. Some networks want to have a claim on the content you write, this is one thing you must investigate before joining. No blog network should expect to own (and have all rights to) your articles/ posts unless they pay well for them. Some networks will not allow you to post something you have written previously, they only want completely fresh content, never posted elsewhere. This can make it hard to stick to a tight posting schedule, especially if you are expected to write long posts.

Don't start with any blog network expecting to make a lot of money and see your traffic bloom overnight. You still have to do your own work, a lot of it. Whatever promoting the network does is for the network itself, it's only a bonus to your own work on promoting your own individual topic on the network. This is one reason to pick an established and well known network. Being a part of something larger than yourself will give you credentials and give you some authority on the topic you write. (You do still have to actually know what you are writing about however).

Before you joined a blog network spend time looking at the blogs already in the network. Do you like the layout, the set up? Are they getting traffic and blog comments? Have you heard of the blog network or seen it referenced in other places? Are they easy to read or do they carry so many ads the content is pretty much secondary? What do you think of the blogs you look at from the point of a reader? Will being part of this network benefit you in prestige, community or profits from ads? If you send a note to a couple of the bloggers already in the network do they reply, do they take a really long time to reply? If you can get a reply are the bloggers chatty or do they try to send a one sentence reply as if they don't want to interact at all? Read all you can about the network on their site, make sure it is a good fit for you before you make a lot of plans for finding fame and fortune there.

Note: I'm not recommending any of the blog networks here just by posting them. I wanted to give anyone interested a selection of blog networks to look over.

Want to see what I look like?

Men want to meet Dommes, real women who enjoy Dominating men. However, men don't seem to understand that we are real women, people too. We have interests, thoughts and lives that have nothing to do with tying men up, teasing and tormenting them. (As much fun as all that is).

I'm writing this blog for myself mainly. I used to write a weekly column called Bait & Switch for Adult BackWash. (BackWash is closed now). I would write about sex, kinky stuff, online dating, romance, passion and sensuality. I also wrote about my views as a woman who likes treating men as my own personal sex toy.

Don't think that I'm some experienced professional, cause I'm not. I never have been. I'm a woman you could meet any day and pass without suspecting I was anything but someone's sister/ daughter/ aunt. Just think about that... how do you know you didn't see me today? I'm a nice girl, a romantic. I tend to be quiet and polite and I'm thinking a lot behind my glasses. I'm the woman your Mother would like you to bring home.

Isn't that ironic?

I like teasing men while they can't do much about it. I like the idea of keeping a man in a cage or tied hand and foot to the frame of the doorway, or told to wear a bib in the restaurant. I like having a man who does it all, not because he has to, not because he could not escape the bondage or just say No, but because he wants to. I like a man who is strong, independent, intelligent and submissive (but only to me). I'm not into sharing quite that much.

I like a home made brand of D/s. Where instead of spending money on toys from a catalogue I am creative and use my own ideas and imagination. I really like having something ordinary become extraordinary fun in a kinky way. It gives you a whole new outlook each time you open a drawer in the kitchen, especially that junk drawer with all the odds and ends. 

I also like writing fiction, Femdom fiction. I've won 2nd place in an erotica writing contest run (in part) by Gloria Brame but that was several years ago. Still, it was quite an honour to me at the time. I've been published in The Dominant's View at least twice. I was there in the very early days of Clean Sheets but I didn't stick with it. I have this problem with being a social misfit/ loner and not giving myself enough credit for the things I can do. Luckily, I don't mind being alone, I keep myself amused. 

Anyway, this is as much information as I feel like giving away right now. I have just begun dating a new male submissive. That's why I'm here, writing adult content again. It's also kind of fun. I did miss it.

Christmas is on my mind today. I'm watching romantic holiday movies. Right now The Lake House with Keanu Reeves. I admit I have a thing for Keanu. How could any Canadian woman not have a soft spot for a hockey player who can dance? It's just finishing up, the final scene, the last great kiss. Funny that he looks older in this movie and yet there is still just something about him... Well, you don't really want to read my mind babbling on about Keanu Reeves.

Will you be blogging for Christmas? Do you keep blogging during the holidays or do you put your blog into suspended animation?

I will be here. For me I like having some alone time during the holidays. This year it is mucked up cause my sister is having a baby and I am the prime babysitter for her other children, those who have left the womb. I will be glad when the babysitting time is done. I am loving having the house to myself for this bit of time. I can cook things the way I like them, or not bother with cooking or eating at all. I did make the Christmas cookies. So I'm not being wicked and lazy and forgetting about the holiday thing. Later, I will haul the Christmas tree and the box of decorations out of the garage. Not looking forward to finding out if mice got in there or not. I'm hoping for at least not too much.

How is your holiday spirit hanging on? Blog about it! :)

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