Romance or Relationship?

The main problem with a long distance relationship is how alone it makes you feel, especially at a time of year when you see so many other happy, loving and together couples. Christmas, Valentines Day are the hardest holidays on people in long distance relationships. Birthdays too, those days when we want to share our time with the people who are most important in our lives.

Start as friends. Don't rush into a relationship, especially when you already have the hurdle of not being in the same location. Don't decide you are in love too soon. This is not going to be an easy, simple relationship where you can get together for a coffee and maybe a movie just because you both have the afternoon free. This is a relationship which is going to take good communication, trust and planning ahead. You also need to know you have the time to put into this relationship. If you can't make time for a relationship really, then don't get into a long distance relationship which will be even harder to work out for your available time.

Over 100 Long Distance Relationship Activities and Ideas

Spend Your Time Apart

Don't neglect your time apart. Keep working on the things that make up your own individual life. Spend time with your family and friends. Work on achieving things at work or school. Keeping your life busy and full not only makes the time pass faster but better too.

Don't put your life on hold while you wait for the relationship to change. That won't work. You will end up bored, frustrated and you will miss the feeling of accomplishment and being part of the world which you need when you are dealing with a long distance relationship.

LDR Ideas and Tips

• Long Distance Relationships

• Discovery Health - 10 Reasons Why Long-distance Relationships Just Don't Work

• CANOE - Lifewise: Tips to survive long distance relationships

• Long-Distance Relationships - Survival Guide - Slice

• How to make your long-distance relationship last - Canadian Living

• How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work - wikiHow

• The Rules: How to Have a Lasting Long-Distance Relationship - Shine from Yahoo! Canada

• Long-Distance Relationship - AskMen

• Long Distance Relationships: Connecting from Afar : TwoOfUs.org

• Saying "I Love You" from a Far

• Loving from Afar: Tips for Enduring a Long-distance Relationship - Yahoo! Voices - voices.yahoo.com

• Long distance relationships: How to make long distance relationships work - sofeminine.co.uk

• Love from Afar: Staying Close While You Live Apart | Psychology Today

Communicate Over Distances

Use video chat and webcams if you have them. This is a way to see and hear the person you are talking to when you are talking online.

Schedule time to get together online and stick to it. Whether you get together in reality or virtually, don't miss a date once it is set. If something does come up give notice as soon as you can and then arrange a new date and time when you know you can be available.

Use snail mail. Send cards, letters, postcards even. Not just for special days but any old regular day. You can have a plan to send a weekly letter with news, thoughts and ideas as they come along over the week. Snail mail is a cost effective way to keep in touch and it has a personal touch which you can't get using email.

Take a digital photo of yourself every now and then or on occasions and share it through email. In this way email is nice because there won't be a long wait to see the photo, it can be there that same day - even that same hour or minute.

Send little gifts. You don't need to spend a lot of money on the gift or on the postage and packaging for the gift to get there. Little things mean a lot. Listen to what he or she says. Pick up on what they say and surprise them with shampoo samples when they get a new haircut. Send them coffee beans - something you think they would like. There are all kinds of small and sample sized things which can be sent in the mail.

You can even shop online at sites like Etsy, CafePress and Artfire and have surprise gifts sent to his or her address from you. There are so many great things you can pick out from online handmade craft sites. I especially like Etsy.

Join social media sites like Twitter, Pinterest, Facebook (not my favourite), Skype, Yahoo! Messenger and share things you find online. Send interesting website links, photos that catch your imagination and ideas for things you will do when you are together, in person, again.

Get your own family and friends involved. The relationship will feel much more real and alive if more people are part of it, or at least know about it. Once you know you have grown past the stage of being friends talk about your family. Introduce your family and friends to your long distance partner.

Plan Ahead

When you have a date, time and location set for your next meeting, start making plans. You can have a lot of fun thinking of all the things you might do when you are together again. Of course, the list will soon grow and you won't be able to fit everything in. Decide which are the most important things and put those the top of the list. Plan how they will fit together and how your schedule will flow.

Plan a vacation together. Meet somewhere in the middle of your two locations or head somewhere you both have always wanted to travel to. You can have a great week just the two of you at a romantic bed and breakfast in the mountain. Or, you might pick a seaside cottage which you can rent by the week. Or, a wintery vacation with skiing and hot chocolate in the north.

If you can only get away for an overnight or a day, the bed and breakfast is a nice plan. Also, consider a picnic for just the afternoon. It's nice to at least be in the same time and space, even if only for a day, a morning or an afternoon, or for one evening. If nothing else you can meet at the bus or train station (or the airport) for a romantic kiss and cuddle as one of you passes through town.

Talk About It

Issues will come up. They always do. Whatever comes up in your long distance relationship, talk about it.

Talk about feeling lonely and alone.

Talk about a change to the relationship.

Talk about being angry or sad and all your other feelings.

Don't put off talking about something important because you don't want to hurt your partner's feelings. Really, isn't that just a cop out for not wanting to face having to tell them bad news and deal with the fallout? If you really do care for this person you will be honest with them.

If you lose the honesty then there can't be trust in the relationship. At that point it really can't work out. A long distance relationship needs communication and trust.

Get away from the usual distractions, the every day stress and take a road trip with the one you love. Bring romance back into your relationship with some time alone, some snacks, a road map and a vehicle for two.

Share a few adventures. Make a plan but be prepared to stray from the plan. Try a road just because it caught your eye. Maybe the name of the street was unusual or reminded you of something. Or, it might be a road leading to a beach, an old mill, something for you to discover together. Don't worry about getting lost. That's just part of the adventure. Together, with the map, you can figure it all out. Besides, you can't really be too lost when you're together.

If you can spend some extra money rent a fancy car for the trip. Plan a great place to stay overnight too, a romantic bed and breakfast or a luxurious hotel.

Leave children at home for this trip. This is grown ups only. If you have children get a babysitter who can stay late, even over night if you can manage to splurge on a hotel or a bed and breakfast. There are all kinds of games, not all of them are for the road.

Get Lost Together

People seem to think there is something wrong with being lost. I know people who will never leave the main road because they fear getting lost. It's actually not so easy to get lost when you have a good map. Find a map of your area which shows the back roads. You might bring along a compass to give you the extra direction for north, south, east and west. Between the map, the compass and your own common sense you can find your way into a town or back to the busier roads. So don't let a simple thing like getting lost stop you from having an adventure off the every day route and roadways.

Do Things Together

Leave the mobile phones and other communication devices at home. But bring your camera. Read the settings so you can set the timer and snap photographs of yourselves, together. Or ask other people you come across to take the photos for you. Make sure you have several photos where one of you isn't hidden behind the camera.

Stop for a lunch or dinner (a breakfast if you are out there and on the road early) but don't go to a restaurant. Pick a grocery store, or a farmer's market or roadside stand and gather your goodies. If the weather is good have your own picnic outdoors. If the weather is snowy or wet and cold eat in the vehicle. (Most of us have gone through the drive through at some fast food place and eaten in the car when we are alone).

If you see something interesting like a roadside attraction, a local fair or festival take a break from the driving and explore together. Buy baked goods, fresh produce, arts and crafts or buy nothing at all. The only thing that matters is that you stick together and talk about the things you see.

Play Road Games

Don't laugh or think the old road games are too silly or just for children. Any little game to help pass the time will also give you something to talk about, something to laugh about too. What games did you play on family trips when you were a kid: I Spy, Licence Plate Bingo, memory games and finding the alphabet.

Bring along a good book and read to each other. Try romantic poetry if that suits your style.

Don't forget music. Pull off to the side of the road, turn up the car radio and dance together. See if you can work your way up to a cuddly slow dance.

If you can't dance then sing together. Put on the old familiar tunes and see who can remember most of the words and who has the most creative wrong words.

Share the back seat. Cuddle, make out or just curl up and have a nap together.

At the End of the Day

Use souvenirs, mementos, the photos you took to create a scrapbook from the trip. You don't need to be a scrapbooker, just make something out of all the photos which you can pull out later to remember the trip. Use the collection you create to tell the story of the trip. It will also work great when you're planning the next road trip romance.

Get away from the usual distractions, the every day stress and take a road trip with the one you love. Bring romance back into your relationship with some time alone, some snacks, a road map and a vehicle for two.

Share a few adventures. Make a plan but be prepared to stray from the plan. Try a road just because it caught your eye. Maybe the name of the street was unusual or reminded you of something. Or, it might be a road leading to a beach, an old mill, something for you to discover together. Don't worry about getting lost. That's just part of the adventure. Together, with the map, you can figure it all out. Besides, you can't really be too lost when you're together.

If you can spend some extra money rent a fancy car for the trip. Plan a great place to stay overnight too, a romantic bed and breakfast or a luxurious hotel.

Leave children at home for this trip. This is grown ups only. If you have children get a babysitter who can stay late, even over night if you can manage to splurge on a hotel or a bed and breakfast. There are all kinds of games, not all of them are for the road.

Get Lost Together

People seem to think there is something wrong with being lost. I know people who will never leave the main road because they fear getting lost. It's actually not so easy to get lost when you have a good map. Find a map of your area which shows the back roads. You might bring along a compass to give you the extra direction for north, south, east and west. Between the map, the compass and your own common sense you can find your way into a town or back to the busier roads. So don't let a simple thing like getting lost stop you from having an adventure off the every day route and roadways.

Do Things Together

Leave the mobile phones and other communication devices at home. But bring your camera. Read the settings so you can set the timer and snap photographs of yourselves, together. Or ask other people you come across to take the photos for you. Make sure you have several photos where one of you isn't hidden behind the camera.

Stop for a lunch or dinner (a breakfast if you are out there and on the road early) but don't go to a restaurant. Pick a grocery store, or a farmer's market or roadside stand and gather your goodies. If the weather is good have your own picnic outdoors. If the weather is snowy or wet and cold eat in the vehicle. (Most of us have gone through the drive through at some fast food place and eaten in the car when we are alone).

If you see something interesting like a roadside attraction, a local fair or festival take a break from the driving and explore together. Buy baked goods, fresh produce, arts and crafts or buy nothing at all. The only thing that matters is that you stick together and talk about the things you see.

Play Road Games

Don't laugh or think the old road games are too silly or just for children. Any little game to help pass the time will also give you something to talk about, something to laugh about too. What games did you play on family trips when you were a kid: I Spy, Licence Plate Bingo, memory games and finding the alphabet.

Bring along a good book and read to each other. Try romantic poetry if that suits your style.

Don't forget music. Pull off to the side of the road, turn up the car radio and dance together. See if you can work your way up to a cuddly slow dance.

If you can't dance then sing together. Put on the old familiar tunes and see who can remember most of the words and who has the most creative wrong words.

Share the back seat. Cuddle, make out or just curl up and have a nap together.

At the End of the Day

Use souvenirs, mementos, the photos you took to create a scrapbook from the trip. You don't need to be a scrapbooker, just make something out of all the photos which you can pull out later to remember the trip. Use the collection you create to tell the story of the trip. It will also work great when you're planning the next road trip romance.

Be Aware of Pollination and Flower Allergies

Most plant and flower allergies are caused by plants which are pollinated by the wind versus those pollinated by insects. So this is something to consider if you are looking at which plants to grow in your garden. If you plant insect pollinated flowers (entomophilous) you will have less allergy trouble. If you plant wind pollinated flowers (anemophilous) you will probably be itchy, sneezy and all the rest.

There are a lot of different fabrics which can be used to create flowers. Fabric flowers are good for people who can't have real flowers around for some reason, like allergies. I've got allergies and asthma myself. So flowers that don't have pollen at their centres are a good thing.

Not everyone likes or wants real flowers. Whether it's an event (like a wedding) or just flowers for around your home, it's nice having something add a splash of colour. Unlike plastic or silk flowers - a fabric bouquet could be put in the washer on the gentle cycle once in awhile and come out okay. This makes it good for people with allergies who need to keep down the dust bunny population in their home.

Not all fabric flowers will be machine washable. It will depend on how they were made. Chances are anything glued together won't survive a washing machine. But, any fabric flower can be dusted. Or, if you really have to be careful about dust, give them away and make new flowers a few times over the year. Not only will you be making someone else happy, but you will have a new flowers and a great excuse to do more experimenting with colours, shape, styles and fabric for your flowers.

Three Ways to Try Cleaning Fabric Flowers

Try a sink of soapy water (dish soap will do) and swish the flowers in the water. Cool water should be ok for flowers which are glued together rather than sewn flowers. Blot flowers dry.

Try a spray bottle with a mix of white vinegar and water and spritz the flowers to freshen them up. Blot dry with a clean cloth. It may not clean them well, but it will help if they have picked up odours from inside.

Try a dry clean method. Put a little salt or cornmeal in a bag, wrap the bag around the flower and shake it gently for a couple of minutes. The grit of the salt or cornmeal will pick up dirt and dust and remove it. This is one way to clean flowers which can not get wet.

A boyfriend sent me this years ago. I don't know where the original card is any more but I'm so glad I retyped it into my old LiveJournal account. Today I found it there.  If it has a title I don't know it.

Take my hand. Let's travel life together... but let's take time to savor where we go.

We'll measure distance, not in miles but kisses. We'll pack our smiles and leave our cares behind.

Instead of postcards, we'll collect embraces, and I'll memorize your face on moonlit nights...

We'll leave the road for meadows, beaches, cafes, and secret places only we will know.

Life's too short for us to ever finish a journey that explores our heart's desires, so let's go now...

We won't regret one minute of traveling life together hand in hand.

Alarie Tennille