I was watching Global TV news this morning. They reported that men (under 35) think gender equality has gone too far and men should always have the last word in the home. I'd make a joke, or think of something sarcastic, but honestly I just feel the problem is overwhelming. Maybe far back in time women were respected as people, that has been gone a terribly long time.
Wikipedia is doing this #SheSaid Wiki Loves Women thing. I'd like to support it. I just don't feel I can rely on it.
The idea of giving more women a voice, or a place/forum to hear the voice they've been using for years.... is great. But, is it really about women anymore? Or is this just another placebo. Using inclusivity as a way to exclude women while pushing the agenda of men who think putting on make up, a skirt and having body modifications is all a woman really is?
I've lived through too many years as a real woman to accept men (no matter how demanding and aggressive) as women.
It bothers me that we don't even think of this as a feminist issue. The men have infiltrated and influenced too far for women to get their heads above it and have a voice. More likely, it will be other men protesting the issue, who are heard. Not us, not the women being pushed out of our own gender.
Today I was fired from writing for the Sims Community site. Fired is not the right word because it wasn't so much employment as getting paid a little for writing posts for the website, more like contract work (there's probably another word for it). Anyway, that's not so important.
Here is the note I was left on discord:
Hope you're doing well. I was emailed last night by one of our readers about your Twitter profile containing several negative and harmful remarks about the trans community. While I fully support the free exchange of viewpoints and opinions, I can't in good concience continue to work with someone who actively talks negative about the marginalized community that makes up our reader base, and our team of authors who are a part of the LGBTQ+ community.
This decision is effective immediately. Any finished content that you've completed for Sims Community that hasn't been paid for yet will be paid when / if you provide the filled spreadsheets.
Wishing you well in your future endeavours, Jovan
Cancel culture strikes again. I was fired for personal posts on a different social media account (I only posted about The Sims 4 on the bluesky social media account I used for my writer profile) by someone anonymous. They must have put in time to dig into my social media accounts. I haven't posted often or lately about women's rights. I guess the anonymous reader felt it was worth their time. Of course, I had no say in the firing. No information about what I actually posted that was so upsetting. But, who am I? Just one of the people who used to "make up the reader base" and thought I would enjoy contributing to the site.
Funny, because I only made 5 posts to the site. How many people actually read or knew about me there, not many I'm sure.
What I've thought about since, after being surprised and disappointed in society in general, is that most people who play The Sims 4 are women. Real, biological women. Also, most of the readers at the site are likely real, biological women. Like myself.
I'm not going to get into posting about the issue of women's rights now. I'm just making note of the facts. Cancel culture is very strong, determined and does not care about facts, understanding, or discussion. (In spite of what they claim).
I don't really care who made a point of digging into my social media and sending it to the site owner at Sims Community. It could have been one of the other writers who strongly supports trans people over biological women. The writing was on the wall really, when I attempted to write about the DEI mod and was denied because I did not write strongly against it and turn the post into a strongly worded advocate for trans political beliefs, bashing all those who disagree, or feel otherwise and don't say much.
Sims Community is just one site, about a game. In the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter a lot. I won't miss writing for it. I'd begun to lose heart in it after the DEI thing. If you want, you can read the very strong trans positive post they did post instead of mine. I'm not going to link it. (Comments were not allowed with the post).
I think its rubbish really, very slanted and biased. Its not what journalism should be and, I guess, its fair enough for them to post as they like. Its not a site with journalism standards. I'm not intending to backlash or put the site down. There are plenty of sites out to make money by getting people to click on ads, more of them are running AI instead of having people write any more. AI is cheaper and can spew out posts much faster with all the right keywords. I don't think a website, or a game, can have integrity if they push their own agenda so belligerently.
Back to the point about The Sims players mainly being women, biological women. What do we think about the game these days? I'm a player myself. I've bought far too many of the packs, etc. I've spent more money than I even want to admit. It bothers me, as a player, that the game is focused on gender issues far more than I am. If some players want it that way okay. But, there is no option to turn it off, to run the game your way. Why not? The Sims is a virtual dollhouse, run by one person, one player. Why can't I have the dollhouse my way?
Are we being brainwashed by EA, or whoever has recently bought out the franchise now?
What will the new owners bring? I'm curious. If they are of the Middle East culture they may not go with the trans culture and beliefs currently pushed in the game. I've read some people posting about this already, concerned about it, one way or another. I'm not so much concerned as I am interested. I'd feel better about spending more money on more packs and such for the game if the gender politics were removed, or became optional at least. I'm tired of feeling like a biological woman in a trans/man's world.
The most recent pack about imaginary friends for children, I am not buying. It gave me a sick, icky feeling in a game with so much focus on gender control and stereotypes. Of course, its being heavily plugged on the Sims Community site. I won't miss that part of writing there.
This is what I posted to the site owner. It may not have gone through because I deleted his account and the site from my discord account. No point in keeping them around, "effective immediately".
OK. But, I will post that I was fired for posting for women's rights on social media. I have nothing against you or the site, but it makes me angry that people are not allowed to discuss or disagree at all regarding trans issues. Anyway, no point in talking about it, as per usual. You can remove my author profile (if you haven't already) and show my posts as written by an unknown author or whatever you like. I won't send in for payment, that wasn't so important for me.
That Girl ran for five seasons, 1966 to 1971. At the time Ann Marie was the first career girl/ woman, living as a single, independent woman. The show starred Marlo Thomas as Ann Marie and Ted Bessell as Donald Hollinger.
Marlo Thomas wanted a show where where the main character was a modern young woman focused on her own goals. Originally, she wanted the show to be called Miss Independence which was the nickname given to her by her own parents.
After the feminist protest against bras and other feminine products from the Miss America pageant in 1968, Marlo Thomas went braless on That Girl.
The show begins as Ann Marie leaves her home in Brewster, New York and moves to Manhattan, planning to become an actress. She moves into apartment 4-D at 344 West 78th Street, New York City. She gets an agent who wants her to change her name. However, her parents don't like this and Ann decides to keep her own name. A lot of the show was not about Ann bulldozing her way through but about how she could listen, compromise and yet still be true to her own heart and goals.
Each week the show follows the story of Ann, her friends and neighbours in the apartment building and others she meets in between places. Also, her boyfriend, Donald Hollinger, a reporter for Newsview magazine. In between auditions and acting classes she takes odd and part time jobs. Donald and Ann meet during the filming of a TV commercial she is in.
Ann and Donald dated and then were engaged but there was no happy ending because the show was cancelled before they were married. Marlo Thomas wanted the show to end on a high note so Ann and Donald never married during the final season because Marlo Thomas did not want to send the message that the end goal for every woman should be to get married, as if that were the reason the show could now end.
A pioneer those days, That Girl was one of the first TV shows about a single woman living and working on her own. Before Mary Tyler Moore Show or Murphy Brown, That Girl portrayed women as career women who could still be feminine and fashionable.
I don't know how I have such strong memories of watching That Girl. I was born at the end of 1964 so I would have been about two years old when it started. But, I do remember it well. I remember her clothes, I remember her voice and I remember always managing to work things out by the end of each show.
Later in my own life, when I was on the Internet and wanted a login name I could use online for all kinds of sites and not feel silly about, I picked That Grrl. A modern, digitally correct version of That Girl. I still use That Grrl, or thatgrrl, on almost every site I begin an account online.
When I was about 20 I decided to look into religions. I knew the traditional Christian ways were not for me. I didn't like they way these religions viewed women. I had just read a book where the women were put into isolation after having their period or giving birth, they were "unclean". This was on top of growing up with the Adam and Eve mythology. From that point the Bible (written and rewritten by men) just goes on to look down on women, and worse. If I were a male, I would probably never have become Pagan. I would never have begun researching other religions and beliefs and looked deeper than the surface. Most likely I would have put religion behind me as not being all that important.
My Early Pagan Experience
I started with Witchcraft and Wicca because I found a book written in the 70's. It's a book I wouldn't choose to read now but parts of it were enough to send me looking for more information from more reliable sources. I found a Pagan bookstore referred to in a book. I made the hour long bus trip to downtown Toronto and found the place. Entering for that first time was not easy. I felt daring and yet I also felt I was walking into a place I didn't fully belong and might not be welcome. I wondered if they could see inside of me, my mind and my thoughts. Would they know what I was thinking, could they see my future and my past, my aura...? That was creepy.
The first thing that really happened was the smell. Ever since then I have noticed the same smell, strongly of incense over time, in every Pagan bookstore. I like pulling out a book I bought in a Pagan store. Even a couple of decades later I can smell it in the pages. If the smell ever goes away I don't know. So far it hasn't.
My adventure in that first Pagan store was intimidating. If I were less determined or less curious I doubt I would have tried another Pagan store. The people there did watch me and yet said nothing. Maybe they thought I was going to walk off with something, maybe they were just curious too, I won't know and I didn't ask then. I was already the shy type. I bought a book and a couple of polished rocks and I left, glad to be out of there. I was left with the feeling of not belonging and I never did go back to that store. Luckily there were others and more came along later.
Finding Where and How I Fit In
A few years more and the Internet came along too. By that time I was making my own decisions about what I believed and how I believed it. I didn't accept Wicca as it came. I took what felt right to me and put it together with how I felt about the world and it's people. I still believe this way; I'm very much an eclectic solitary type of Pagan. I gave myself the label of Earth Witch and I've stuck with that, to keep the explanation simple. To me an Earth Witch means I focus on the Earth, the natural and I don't feel influenced by deities or magick. I believe we each create our own magick from ourselves and it is up to each of us to choose how to use it, or not use it.
I have written about my Pagan beliefs before but not shared much of my actual experience. I used to get email from young women who wanted to know more about being Pagan. The main thing they wanted to know was how to hide it from their parents. I was never behind this. For one thing, if you have to hide it, maybe you should rethink the whole thing.
I do understand that some families are very Christian and close minded or even afraid of Pagan ideas and Pagan ways. If that is the case and you are living at home, this is not the time for you to explore being Pagan. Wait until you can do it openly. In the meantime, there is no reason you can't do simple things like have a collection of rocks, maybe some shells and feathers, keep a journal about your observations of nature, history and people. These are things you can do without upsetting your parents and family. You can be Pagan without having to prove you're Pagan. Know it yourself and start there.
Nowadays...
For me, being Pagan is a personal thing. I mainly keep it to myself. I've found a local group with weekly meetings but I have yet to venture out and attend one. I think I will. Each time I have stepped out and met other Pagans I have enjoyed the experience and learned new things about history, religion and beliefs. But, I'm comfortable with what I believe now, the way my feelings about being an Earth Witch have evolved. So I'm not as eager to stir myself up as I was when I was younger and just starting to explore and discover.