It's such a nice feeling to be happy with something you wrote. Sure I could have let it sit overnight and come back to it with more ideas and points to add, but it's good as it is. I like it.

So here it is... my fresh column from Bewitching Vagabond at BackWash

Good Girls Don't

Did you know I write erotica? Well, I do. Not often, just when I come up with an intriguing idea. It's different to other writing. For one thing I do battle with myself about it frequently. Why, you might wonder.

It's that whole good girls don't write naughty stories sort of thing. Truly good girls don't even read that stuff either but I'm too old to still be that good. I'm a divorced woman now, you can't expect me to be snow white pure any more. Yes, I don't mean to shock you, but even good, nice, sweet girls have sex at least now and then. Though we have to wait to be asked. We aren't allowed to go out and hunt them down. Check the rule book if you're in doubt.

Not that hunting them down doesn't sound fun... Now I'm getting sidetracked. But, still, umm, I'll just file a few things away for another time. Back in a bit.

OK, that's one other part of writing erotica, getting ideas at inconvenient moments. It happens to most writers but with erotica it's not always so easy to jot down notes at work, on the bus, at the dinner table, etc. People might see what you wrote!!! Can you imagine your Mother reading something erotic in your penmanship? My Mother wouldn't quite be shocked, just that kind of disappointed thing. Thus the whole good girls don't complex again.

Anyway, writing erotica is kind of a dare for me. A dare to myself. I used to think it was some deep, dark secret I had to keep from the rest of the world and everyone at BackWash. But, I'm not good at keeping secrets. Just ask anyone who has asked me to keep a secret. Eventually I forget we're keeping it a secret and I just blab about it when the subject comes up in conversation.

I hope you have something you dare to do in spite of the world. It's fun, freeing too. Kind of like standing on the edge of a cliff, the path not taken and then taking that step and letting all the preconceived notions of proper civilization fly away as you fall into a life of sin. Not quite sin, but it looks good on paper. Just like the erotica itself, it looks good on paper but who knows if any of it would ever work out that way.

Which is another thing, I have to wonder what people think when they read the stuff that comes out of the darkened corners of my brain. Do they think that's me or do they know that's just some part of me leaking out again.

In the end, I have to know who I am and just go with it. Let me know how it turns out... I'll just keep my eyes closed the way good girls should.

For the Adult BackWash column this evening/ early morning, I wrote about writing erotica. Here for your viewing pleasure...

Writing is always taking a chance, putting yourself out there, on a limb. I think that is even more so when you are writing fiction with fewer guides to track yourself and maintain your anonymity. You are putting more of yourself on paper than you think at the time, if you're doing a good job. Especially when you write about sex. It's already a taboo, hushed up subject. So, to write about your personal sex life or your thoughts about the whole thing in general is kind of setting yourself up for a fall each time. You are exposing yourself to the judgment of the masses. Not so different from getting into a car every day and hoping no one will smash into you. We trust the other drivers to be self interested enough to avoid accidents. But, when you are writing, the self interest is all on the writer's side. The reader is a complete unknown, out to please themselves.

Anyway, I decided to write about writing erotica. Most of the rules are the same when it comes to punctuation, grammar, spelling all that proper rules of the page sort of thing. I think the biggest challenge for writing erotica is keeping it from being boring. As if sex could be boring, right? Well, it can. Try reading the same thing a hundred times. He puts it in her, she likes it, they come. There, that's a sex scene. Was it good for you?

While you wipe yourself down...

When a story has no real plot or character development, just mechanical sex with a lot of naughty words and phrases tossed in it becomes more stroke fiction than erotic fiction. This might please a reader who just wants to jack off but someone who wants to actually become aroused and linger in arousal leading to foreplay, will be disappointed and likely frustrated too.

Another unique challenge to writing about sex, the name calling. What do you call it? My personal preference is cock for the penis. It has a blend of cuteness and crudeness that I seem to favour. As far as the vagina, I've sort of settled on pussy for lack of anything better. I don't like it though. If something else comes along I'll be glad to switch. There are so many variations for breasts, vagina, penis, butt, sex, come and so on. As the writer you have to find words you can live with and words your readers won't laugh at or not understand.

Avoid 10 inch cocks, breasts like watermelons, anything that will seem improbable to your readers. Errors of mechanics are just that, things that easily believed. You can't have a character doing something that he/ she couldn't physically do. That is where really proofreading your work comes in. See the action in your head as you read it over. Make sure it's clear who is doing what to whom.

Erotic writing tends to use a lot of metaphors and similes. Things like "her pussy was wetter than the whole of Lake Ontario". I'd personally choose not to use that one, though I did just make it up on the spot. (Don't blame someone else). You want to keep your metaphors as part of the action, don't make them stand out and drag readers out of the story and into your writing. The idea is to keep them fully involved in the action, not in your sensational writing. Also, use phrases that don't sound gross or silly.

Break up your sentences and paragraphs. The breaks are the spots where the reader breathes and moves onto the next part of the action/ plot. You can also use short sentences to spike the action. A short sentence gets attention and stands out. But don't go overboard. Any writing should have transitional sentences at the end of one paragraph and the start of the next, it keeps things flowing without awkward pauses while the reader catches up with you.

Don't forget to use dialogue. This also breaks up the story and keeps it interesting. Reading solid text is boring. Just pick up a text book and see how erotic you feel. Reading solid chunks of text takes patience. When the action is moving fast your sentences and paragraphs should be short. Using dialogue is one way to keep things short and moving.

Sex is a sensual thing, it involves the five senses: touch, sight, smell, sound and taste. Include them in your writing. It brings things to life for the reader. Bringing senses into play draws them into the scene and the ongoing action.

Yet again, character development and motivation. Even erotica should have some point or reason. Why are your characters interested in each other? What are they thinking? How do they look? Who are they? When is all this happening? Give some purpose to the sex. Develop the erotica into a storyline, make things happen besides two bodies bumping together.

At the end, you need a conclusion, something to mark the end, to let the reader know it's over and (hopefully) something to leave them wanting more. Articles and stories without some kind of conclusion aren't artsy or dramatic, just frustrating. Remember, the point of erotica is for everyone (reader and writer) to have a good time.

Good erotica writers take risks.

Writing is always taking a chance, putting yourself out there, on a limb. I think that is even more so when you are writing fiction with fewer guides to track yourself and maintain your anonymity. You are putting more of yourself on paper than you think at the time, if you're doing a good job. Especially when you write about sex.

It's already a taboo, hushed up subject. So, to write about your personal sex life or your thoughts about the whole thing in general is kind of setting yourself up for a fall each time. You are exposing yourself to the judgment of the masses. Not so different from getting into a car every day and hoping no one will smash into you. We trust the other drivers to be self interested enough to avoid accidents. But, when you are writing, the self interest is all on the writer's side. The reader is a complete unknown, out to please themselves.

Anyway, I decided to write about writing erotica. Most of the rules are the same when it comes to punctuation, grammar, spelling all that proper rules of the page sort of thing. I think the biggest challenge for writing erotica is keeping it from being boring. As if sex could be boring, right? Well, it can. Try reading the same thing a hundred times. He puts it in her, she likes it, they come. There, that's a sex scene. Was it good for you?

While you wipe yourself down...

When a story has no real plot or character development, just mechanical sex with a lot of naughty words and phrases tossed in it becomes more stroke fiction than erotic fiction. This might please a reader who just wants to jack off but someone who wants to actually become aroused and linger in arousal leading to foreplay, will be disappointed and likely frustrated too.

Another unique challenge to writing about sex, the name calling. What do you call it? My personal preference is cock for the penis. It has a blend of cuteness and crudeness that I seem to favour. As far as the vagina, I've sort of settled on pussy for lack of anything better. I don't like it though. If something else comes along I'll be glad to switch. There are so many variations for breasts, vagina, penis, butt, sex, come and so on. As the writer you have to find words you can live with and words your readers won't laugh at or not understand.

Avoid 10 inch cocks, breasts like watermelons, anything that will seem improbable to your readers. Errors of mechanics are just that, things that are not easily believed. You can't have a character doing something that he/ she couldn't physically do. That is where really proofreading your work comes in. See the action in your head as you read it over. Make sure it's clear who is doing what to whom.

Erotic writing tends to use a lot of metaphors and similes. Things like "her pussy was wetter than the whole of Lake Ontario". I'd personally choose not to use that one, though I did just make it up on the spot. (Don't blame someone else). You want to keep your metaphors as part of the action, don't make them stand out and drag readers out of the story and into your writing. The idea is to keep them fully involved in the action, not in your sensational writing. Also, use phrases that don't sound gross or silly.

Break up your sentences and paragraphs. The breaks are the spots where the reader breathes and moves onto the next part of the action/ plot. You can also use short sentences to spike the action. A short sentence gets attention and stands out. But don't go overboard. Any writing should have transitional sentences at the end of one paragraph and the start of the next, it keeps things flowing without awkward pauses while the reader catches up with you.

Don't forget to use dialogue. This also breaks up the story and keeps it interesting. Reading solid text is boring. Just pick up a text book and see how erotic you feel. Reading solid chunks of text takes patience. When the action is moving fast your sentences and paragraphs should be short. Using dialogue is one way to keep things short and moving.

Sex is a sensual thing...

Sex is a sensual thing, it involves the five senses: touch, sight, smell, sound and taste. Include them in your writing. It brings things to life for the reader. Bringing senses into play draws them into the scene and the ongoing action.

Yet again, character development and motivation. Even erotica should have some point or reason. Why are your characters interested in each other? What are they thinking? How do they look? Who are they? When is all this happening? Give some purpose to the sex. Develop the erotica into a storyline, make things happen besides two bodies bumping together.

At the end, you need a conclusion, something to mark the end, to let the reader know it's over and (hopefully) something to leave them wanting more. Articles and stories without some kind of conclusion aren't artsy or dramatic, just frustrating. Remember, the point of erotica is for everyone (reader and writer) to have a good time.

 Originally posted to Adult BackWash: Saturday August 23, 2003  

Originally posted to Adult BackWash: Monday August 18, 2003  

He looks brave, standing there. His hands skim my naked skin like butterflies, intense yet without direction. I like it. I know this is very intense for him, his first time.

He's not handsome but there was something about him. When he let it slip that he was still a virgin I couldn't resist the sexual drama of being the first. After all, a woman only gets so many chances to truly be worshipped.

So, here we are. The hotel is nice, the carpets are soft and white. The sheets are smooth and white. His shirt is crisp, cotton, white and still covering his body. I know he's feeling intimidated by my nakedness. I like it. I love knowing I'm in control of my own seduction. …more

Originally posted to Adult BackWash: Sunday June 15, 2003  

I have a little man. I often take him with me inside my purse. He's naked all the time. I like to open my purse and have a look at him now and then. Sometimes I enjoy picking him up and blowing gently over his body. He always gets excited. His little cock pricks right up and he makes the cutest tiny little moans as he gets harder and harder, needing so much to finally come. Sometimes I let him. I just carefully wrap him up in a tissue and let him blow. He's easy to clean up, one tissue is more than enough.

Sometimes I like to let him out to walk about on my desk at work. Everyone thinks he is some kind of wind up toy. A pornographic toy but still a toy. They laugh at his antics and wonder how he was made. Other women ask me where I got him so they can get one too. But, I never tell. After all, as far as I know he is the only one. The only tiny man, at his best he is 12 centimetres tall. Like most guys though he likes to pretend size is an issue and he insists he is actually a full 14 centimetres. What can I say, he's in denial.

It's cute having a little man to play with. He is completely normal but for his size. However, I've gradually trained him to clean up after himself and not make all that mess and noise in the first place. Sometimes he grumbles that I keep him as a pet. But, really, what else could a little man be? It's not like you can send him off to work every morning and expect he'd make it back in time for dinner.

Once, I did try to find clothes for him. I bought a few outfits meant for a Ken doll. But he said they didn't fit right, far too tight in the crotch apparently. Unless that was just more manly bragging. So, I keep him naked all the time now. It's kind of funny to watch him walk with that teeny pendulum swinging between his legs. He gets angry if I laugh, so I just keep it to myself.

Whatever else you may say about his size he more than makes up for it with stamina and appetite. He is always in the mood for sex. When I watch TV he likes to surprise me and slip under my nightie. My breasts are his favourite target. He can't really suck on my nipples, they tend to choke him if he sucks too much into his mouth. But he still loves the shape and softness of breasts.

I like it best when he slips down my belly and begins playing with my pussy and clit. It's so delicious how much he can do down there. A bigger man would never discover all the secret, tender places my little man has found. Plus, though it sounds kind of indecent, he can fit his whole body into my vagina. I'm not sure how he breathes but he never seems to worry about it.

He really is like a pocket vibrator. Only he never needs batteries. He is much better for the environment that way. If you wander into a little man of your own I highly suggest keeping him. Just don't let him eat snacks in bed at night. He makes a REAL big mess for such a little man.