What? She’s writing about dating again… Yes, she (I mean) I am. Not for any good or useful purpose. I’m not going to change the world though I humour myself and keep right on trying.

Today let’s talk about online dating etiquette. For one thing, spelling does count and punctuation does matter. I know a lot of guys (my own brother included) who write email that could have been typed by a four year old, or someone really lazy/ sloppy/ careless. Keeping in mind that this email is making your first impression, do you want to appear like a drooling idiot? I’ve come to a new conclusion actually. Men don’t care. They somehow feel dating is like flipping through a catalogue and women are just on order. This is why I’m pretty much finished with online dating but for entertainment purposes.

The other biggie in online dating etiquette is not ignoring people, deliberately. If someone sends you a reply but they don’t sound perfect enough don’t ignore them. That’s just so obnoxious. People who do this should be kept in cages with the other primates and not allowed to socialize at all. I don’t mind (too much) if someone isn’t interested in me due to my eye colour, odd hobbies or the plus sized aspect. But, have the humanity to say “thanks, but no thanks” in some nice way.

People who use no etiquette at all make dating a hell for all of us. Of course, it’s not just men who do this. (So I keep hearing men claim). Good luck. But, honestly, don’t look for the love of your life online. Join BookCrossing or something where real people meet in a group when it’s not about dating. You’re far more likely to find someone that way, when you and they least suspect it.

I was reading about someone who has posted to a freelance job finding site, trying to get someone to list their site in the Dmoz directory. This person wants to pay someone to get the site listed immediately. There were five people who replied. One claimed to have done this before, for payment. The problem with that is a Dmoz editor is unpaid. If an editor is caught taking payments or bribes they will be removed from the directory. It helps keep things honest and fair for everyone submitting their site. Of course, this doesn’t happen much outside of the business sites.

For me it is interesting to read about these plots and plans. I can’t remember being offered a bribe before. I have been pressured to list a site. Whether I do or not depends on the site, if it’s a decent site or a spam farm. It icks me that people try to be so spammy and pushy. I think they have it all wrong.

First, a business should be focused on getting local attention. How does it help a business in Toronto or Montreal or New York to have people from Brazil finding your business. How likely is someone from Brazil to hire a copywriter, a bottling company or a shoe designer from outside of their local area? It’s silly to get so caught up on being listed in a search engine. What does placement matter if the people in your own town have no idea you’re there and available and looking for their business. Focus on what’s right in front of your face and stop obsessing about search engine optimization. Talk to your local newspaper, radio station and the people who hired your competition. Put your time into real promotion rather than something that has you spinning your wheels and wasting your money.

Facial Hair Is Ugly - xxx.com - Don’t look like a man. Remove all facial hair to be beautiful.

The above was on top of my Gmail this morning. An ad supported by Google. An ad that abuses and preys on a commonly known problem for women. An ad that calls women ugly. An ad that sells based on bringing misery. What kind of trash is that for Google to pull? I was surprised they would run an ad like that. I thought Google was progressive and making an effort to have tolerance for race, religion, gender. I guess that only applies in some cases.

It’s so easy for advertisers to target women. We grow up being told how ugly our bodies are. How we need to put so much work into being presentable. Keep yourself pretty from your toes to the top of your head. Heaven forbid she might be human and not smell lovely one day, she might not have white enough teeth, her eyebrows might be a bit bushy, her left nostril might be a millimetre larger than the right nostril. Advertisers have been picking on women as a means of selling for generations. It’s time for it to stop. Google should know better and I really thought they were trying to do better than something backhanded like that.

Valentines Day is approaching. Your lover does not want a new coffee machine, even if he or she really does need one. Some people (mainly men it seems) get into a flap about February 14th, saying it’s too much pressure. Other people (mainly women) get sad around this time of the year. They say they are just tired of being alone and ignored. Someone really needs to put these men and women together.

Men think they are being shafted cause they have to come up with some brilliant and romantic gift/ event/ date. It’s really not that tough. If she is one of those women who really does expect too much maybe you’re just dating the wrong kind of woman. Consider some other single woman. Don’t take this the wrong way but what about looking closer to you, single sisters, widowed Mothers. Instead of pleasing the unpleasable woman in your love life give a few thoughts and a bit of chocolate, maybe even a pretty card to the women in your family.

Women… now don’t look at me like that. I am of the same species. I would love a romantic Valentines Day too. But, have you really lost your mind? Are you expecting him to just ‘know’ what you want? If there is something you really want make it simple and leave him a note with exact instructions about colour, size, etc. Men like having a shopping list rather than feeling hung out to dry.

On the other side of that are the single women who wish they had the prospect of a romantic day. Get over it lovely lady. Create your own day. So what if you are alone? Make it a day for yourself. Plan ahead and decide what you really would like to be doing today. How about treating yourself to a weekend at a Bed & Breakfast? How about buying a bag full of delightful smelling stuff from The Body Shop topped off with a bag of your favourite coffee beans from The Second Cup. Treat yourself the way you want to be treated. Have no shame in being alone. If you weren’t alone you’d have to share the bed, the remote control and clean up once he’s done in the bathroom. There are good things about having a selfish Valentines Day all to yourself. If you really must have company invite over a crowd of grrls and make a sleepover out of it. Have fun.

Yet again I have escaped death! How you may wonder… did I dive with sharks or something adventurous like that. Why no, I crossed the street, with the lights at a well marked pedestrian crosswalk on a clear day. I was even wearing a red coat, almost a bonus stop sign for anyone tempted to drive over me.

I did not get hurt, much. The car went through a red light after the other cars had all stopped. After the pedestrian stick figure light was on, I noticed a car coming from the other side. I assumed it would stop as the other cars had. It didn’t stop, it didn’t even slow down much after it bumped into me and pushed me down into the yucky snow and road salt. My first thought was how much I’d like a handy rock to whip through his/ her back window. Just to help them notice me. Then I looked to get the licence plate but it was too far by the time my brain remembered to use common sense.

Afterwards, after I went back in, changed and missed my bus. After the weekend, I looked up a bit about pedestrians hit by cars. I was really lucky. It seems rare that a pedestrian walks away from being hit. I still consider it being hit, even though I did not end up under the car or flying through the air watching my blood spray the snow. I’m angry. Did you know how many people are killed by a car each day in your town? More than you think, most don’t even make the news any more. I don’t think that’s a good thing. I don’t consider it careless driving either. Whoever was driving that car didn’t care, true. But to call that careless is putting a happy face on something that could have been a nightmare for me and/ or my family.