It's great to 'be there' for a friend. But, what does it mean and how do you do it?

Some days you need a really, great friend. Some days you get to be a really, great friend.

Taking friendship is much easier than giving your friendship. You shouldn't expect anything in return, if you do, it's really not friendship. This is why it's so important to give appreciation and gratitude when you accept friendship.

Being a friend is not easy thing at times. No one can be a perfect friend. We make mistakes, we have our own selfish moments and moments of weakness. Forgive yourself and your friends when we make mistakes, those times we aren't the greatest of best friends. Then look ahead to the next day when we can try again, fix things, talk and make things work out better.

How to be a Great Friend

• Never lie to your friend. You can be kind while still being honest.
• Respect her opinions. Especially when it comes to dating, value that second opinion.
• Balance between listening and talking. Let friends talk about themselves, guilt free and without getting into a one one-upmanship contest.
• Work with each other's strong and weak points. Usually one friend is the leader and the other the follower. One is a planner and the other shows up late. Etc.
• Cultivate the friendship. Have your inside jokes, your shared past and the things you only do with just that friend.
• Don't offer advice too freely. It's often better to wait until asked, or to offer it carefully, just a bit at a time.
• Display some affection, reach out and touch a friend, literally.
• Don't think short term. Plan to keep the friendship going for the long haul.
• Don't be envious or jealous of a friend. Instead be happy for her and proud of her.

I've read about haunted toys, as a concept, before. Each time I just think -- how gullible are these people? How badly do they want to believe in ghosts, spirits and hauntings? I don't believe you see, not to the point of overlooking common sense.

I do think there are ghosts, of some sort. Feelings and emotions left over from the past. Turbulence doesn't just disappear because the cause of the disturbance has gone. It's like having a huge fight with someone. You can feel it in the atmosphere.

But, I don't think that's all there is to the ghost thing. I don't know exactly what I do believe. I haven't quite pinned it down into so many little words. My Grandmother did see ghosts, her sister and her husband both appeared to her soon after they were gone. Gone in a permanent way, not just out of the room or out of town. Seeing ghosts scared her. Me too. I don't trust them all to be benevolent or casual or just want to come over for tea and a chat. So, like my Grandmother before me, I picked a day and spoke out loud and told everything (whatever everything is) that I don't want to see ghosts. My Grandmother was told to do this by a psychic and she said it worked for her. She stopped seeing anything once she clearly said she did not want to see anything, of that sort.

Anyway, the idea of haunted toys annoys me. Why take something simple and kind of innocent and turn it into something frightening?

When I watch the ghost hunting shows I can see through almost everything they do. I understand the difficulties with proving the existence of ghosts when others are watching and the people filming can't show they really didn't cause the camera to shake or prove they really do feel a cold air pocket. But, it seems to look so phony I just can't take it very seriously. It seems scripted, pre-planned.

So I don't believe in haunted toys. I don't believe children who have died would hang around an old toy and try to harm people or scare them with it. Children aren't like that, except in movies.

One good thing about the haunted toy thing, it's a great way to bump up the value of vintage toys. If you can show the toy as haunted... the interest in having the toy (even if just to prove or disprove the ghostly haunting) will help to sell it and sell it for a bigger price. Which just throws more doubt on the concept of haunted toys.

What do you believe? Have you had a haunted toy? Has an old doll given you the creeps? Do toys mysteriously move when you know no one and nothing is logically making them move?

I have felt creeped out by an old doll. I admit. But, I'm sure it was just my own doing. I let myself feel that way. It was based on nothing, just a suggestion by someone else. But, I can remember the feeling. I didn't like it.

One interesting side note... the haunted toys all seem to be dolls. Co-incedence? Not likely.

Robert, the Haunted Doll

Haunted Toys and Dolls

Haunted Doll Stories

Flickr: Creepy Dolls

Misbehaving Toys and People

Annabelle: The Haunted Doll

David's Haunted Dolls

Haunted America Tours: Real Haunted Doll Gallery

Haunted Dolls.net

YouTube: Scary Doll

. 5 Reasons Why It’s Important to Keep Talking About Pussy Riot | xoJane.

I'm just starting to read about Pussy Riot and find out what they are about. As I was looking at another post about them on another blog... I began to think - it's always the young women doing the rebelling, the physical actions, the biggest voices and the most likely to be in the media.

For a moment I felt passed by, as an older woman. Not important any more. Then, I realized how important we really are.

My generation are the women who listen, but more than that, we are the people who give those young women a forum, a way to be heard, a place to speak from.

We are where they cane from. We are the trail blazers, still ahead on the path, holding some of the branches out of their way.

Just because we aren't in the news, being thrown in jail or active in other ways, doesn't mean we are in the background. We are a long way from becoming wallflowers.

I'm not turning 30, I'm closer to 50 now. But, I read this post (link at the bottom) and wrote about turning 30 and getting older in general. Of course, you've read it all before - or lived it yourself. The main thing is the living part, not the number of years. Even when it doesn't feel so great to be having another birthday.

Turning 30 didn't bother me at all. Turning 46 was a bigger issue. Now I'm coming up to 48. I think I've worn myself into the drama of turning 50 so when that year actually comes I will be already over it.

Your post made me laugh, in a good way. Time does pass quickly when you're a kid. We have 12 years to be a kid, part of those years we are too young to tell time. Then we have seven years as a teenager. That passes slowly because of all that teenage angst that just drags along. Then you actually get to be an adult in your 20's. That's just ten years. You have far more years of being an adult than you do for being a kid. So of course, time seems to go faster if you look back.

If you are already worried about menopause you need a hobby or something - you must have far too much time on your hands to think about stuff. Get married, have kids, do all that in between stuff so you have something to show for your wrinkles and grey hair when you do get old enough to think about menopause - when it really is an issue.

As far as skin and hair, I guess everyone is different. I got one grey hair when I was 32, yanked it out and didn't see another until I was past 40. My skin is still the same as ever. Though I sure don't miss the zits of my younger years. I don't find my hair or skin to be coarse or less elastic. I have curly hair. My hair stylist tells me I would have smoother hair if I would just brush it while it was wet. I almost never do, so I have somewhat frizzy hair due to my own tendency not to fuss with hair, cosmetics and etc.

Make the most of all of your years. So far, I would say the 40's are the best years. But, I'm 47 so at least partially biased.

via 5 Reasons Why I Dread Turning 30.

What would you write about turning 30, whether you haven't yet, are right about there or passed age 30?

This is from my old Live Journal posts.

It's been awhile since I posted here. I haven't entirely forgotten LiveJournal but I have a few other sites I'm writing for, my own and a couple for a friend. Since the advent of social media, or since social media became something more than a chatty thing, there isn't enough time to fit everything and every site in.

Today I got reading back to my oldest posts in LiveJournal. I'd forgotten some of the people and places along the way in the past years. I liked remembering some of them. Funny how the guys I was dating who made me feel so bad at the time but now I can really only remember one of them. The only one I actually spent time with in the real world, not just online. Shows how seriously I should have taken all that offline romance. Not seriously at all or in any way.

I'd like to say I'll post here again but the fact is that I probably won't. I notice a bookmarklet up there, seems new (or new to me). I might add it to my browser and see if I can keep this old site from falling stale again.

Happy Summer,

Laura

Comment from lakeguy - always nice to read your posts