Behind every successful woman is a suit of men's clothing? There seems to be a trend for women to dress as men in order to feel successful, confident, professional - the ideal stereotypical man. It's sad for women and unfair to men. Its letting stereotypes continue to thrive when we should be changing them, not ourselves.

People get angry if you post anything less than agreeable about gender transitioning, fluidity, and all the other words and phrases which just keep on showing up. They all mean the same thing really. People have dived so deep into gender stereotypes they can't see their way any more. We don't need gender stereotypes. We don't need more divisions, more definitions of gender.

We live with a flood of gender issues. Created by people, man made - using an old fashioned, non-gender neutral phrase.

We call everyone "guys" while demanding militant attention to gender identity otherwise. It's very weird. I've posted about the "guys" thing before. Today I'm posting about women dressing as men, behaving and acting as they believe men do, stereotypical men. Why are these women changing how they look to suit old stereotypes so they can feel better about themselves? Why do they need a change of clothes to make them feel masculine in order to feel better about themselves? Why do they need to be masculine to be better women?

It really worries me that women can't seem to feel good about being women any more. Too many women seem to feel it is easier to become a masculine stereotype than to live as a woman and feel good about who you are, what you can accomplish, and how the world sees you.

Women call themselves queer, non-binary, gender fluid...  wear traditional/ stereotypical male clothes then believe they are/feel stronger, more professional, business-like, confident. The clothes make the man, they say. But, that's a very old expression. Why isn't it outdated? Why do so many women, people, still believe it, literally?

Gender should not define who you are. You should. Who you are should be about you, not your gender. This is what a stereotype is. Defining someone based on perceptions of race, religion, politics, age, gender, etc. We should be trying to understand this. But we seem to be sinking deeper and deeper into it. Giving the stereotypes new life and much more importance.

A man likes fixing cars and that's ok. A woman likes sewing and crochet, that's ok too. No one expects them to change genders to suit their hobbies, interests, or professions. If a person enjoys ballet we decide they must be feminine. A boy who wants a ballet costume, isn't just a boy interested in ballet and wearing a costume. If a female is interested in fixing cars she must be masculine. A girl who likes science, technology, auto mechanics, carpentry, plumbing, maybe even construction work... she shouldn't also like wearing a pretty pink dress. You can't be feminine and like those "boy things". Does this mean a woman in a dress, or wearing pretty colours, should feel less confident, less capable, less self-reliant? Those are really old stereotypes. Why do we still promote them and worse, believe in them?

More than believing in stereotypes we now enforce them. Women who begin dressing as men (typical and traditional men's clothing styles) say they feel different about themselves. They feel powerful, stronger, all traditional things associated with men. Men dress as women (typical and traditional female clothing, cosmetics, jewelry styles) and say they feel softer, gentler, etc. But, changing your clothes, hairstyle, getting cosmetic surgery, none of that changes your brain. Playing a video game you take on a character, an avatar, but its still you playing the game. Like a wolf in sheep's clothing - the wolf is just wearing a new skin, under that is still a wolf. It's just a skin, a covering, a costume.

If you want to live differently change your personality. You don't need a different pronoun, a new wardrobe or surgery. Just be yourself, the person you want to be. Make the change to who you are, rather than making cosmetic changes to suit a stereotype.

Be yourself. You are not your gender, your gender is just part of the whole. This post may upset some people who don't really read it. Just skim for keywords to go of on a flaming rant. But, it should upset people. People need to think about why we have so many gender issues, why do we still pigeon hole people into what makes a man and what makes a woman, based on preconceived notions from long ago?  Why is that accepted and encouraged and protesting it (pointing it out at all) aggressively discouraged?

People are beginning to prefer no human contact, it seems to me. Not just the mobile phone thing, but the germophobe stuff and choosing to send a text rather than risk catching someone actually live on their mobile phone.

The germophobe thing is odd enough. When did we become so prissy about germs? I think it is based on the lack of actually touching anything. Included in this is the growing need or expectation to be nearly hairless (especially expected of women).

Life is messy. Our food is grown in dirt (not always now, but that is still the basic element). We walk on paved roads, cemented sidewalks and there are people who have not seen a field of grass or the vast ocean. Why are we getting so pristine and yet distancing ourselves farther from the natural, real world?

People will get all upset about a small insect, like a spider, spray the poor creature with all manner of pesticide, cleaning solutions and other substances which we would not want to have in our air.... yet all that is forgotten in the need to kill one insect... without letting it touch us. What do you really expect it to do? Most of them don't bite and are very vulnerable to things like shoes and rolled up newspapers. Or just pick them up and push them outside.

No one likes to give someone bad news but it seems this has now grown into no one likes to talk to anyone, in real time, at all. Text messaging replaces actual conversation.

But, the funniest thing to me is the fear of contamination. From people who will not touch the door handle for fear of germs and yet... they use the washroom and don't wash their hands. Fear of touching the soap, fear of touching the paper towels dispenser... and yet, you could use the soap and water to wash all that off your hands. Instead they live with all the germs and are contaminated all day, spreading it to everyone and everything they come into contact with. Maybe they remember to wash when they get home. I hope so. If they wait until the morning shower... that's a lot of contamination spread around from a full day of picking up germs.

It's been proven that we need human touch. People talk more about love and trade "love you"s more than they did 20 years ago. But, they say it too much and too easily I think. How can you mean someone if you say it so easily and lightly? Saying "love you" should be special, not so commonplace.

Also, the hugging phenomenon. How many people have told you "I'm a hugger" before they envelop you? Why not just shake hands? Or the modern version, the elbow bump.

Human touch is complicated, for those who want it and those who don't.

The sterile scent still in his nostrils triggers his realization: He can’t remember when he was last in physical company.

via Zoe Goodacre: Always In Touch, But Forever Alone [100 Words Into The Future] - Forbes.

Do you know what a white elephant is?

A white elephant is something you'd like to get rid of, its not useful and usually too expensive to use or keep. People sometimes have white elephant gift exchanges, like re-gifting, presents they have been given and would like to get rid of, graciously. The idea is to try finding someone who will love, or at least like, the extravagant, and not useful to most people, gift.

What would you bring to a white elephant gift exchange? Coffee table books, they look nice, they tend to be big with a lot of photos but almost no one actually reads them. Trendy gifts often become white elephants when the fashion turns out to be a fad. There are a lot of small kitchen appliances created for very specific things which are otherwise useful and just taking up space. Or, things which could have been useful if they weren't too exotic, or embarrassing to use. Things which are personalized, too exclusive to be re-gifted and not likely to be accepted for resale at most stores.

My white elephant, from years ago, came with good intentions and thoughtfulness. It was an espresso machine from people who knew I enjoyed coffee but didn't know I had no idea how to get an espresso machine to work. All my attempts ended in kitchen clean ups, not too many steam burns luckily. I never got the hang of it. But, I appreciated the thought.

• art socks
• magnetic poetry
• pet rock

Not the entire list but a few I picked from: 34 Best White Elephant Gift Ideas - FudgeMyLife.

A blog needs to be visually appealing to stand out, attract and keep readers. The content, navigation and spelling alone don't get noticed in that quick, first impression. Illustrations get noticed right away.

Of course, not everyone is an artist. Not everyone can draw or take time to learn to use graphic software. So most people borrow photographs and other images from other sites and people. Mostly everyone does it... kind of expected... even standard and sort of boring. Some of the images really have nothing to do with the post they are attached to. The image is just there for the sake of having an image. A place holder.

A great blog can do better. You can do better and, you don't have to be a great artist or spend time learning anything complicated. You won't need to spend money on new hardware or software (in most cases) either.

Here are ideas to get you started. With the following you can create a vibrant, unique and individual blog which will attract visitors to your blog.

If you have a digital camera get out there and take some photographs. Look at small things and see them up close and from different angels. Looks at groups and large quantities of things and photograph them. If you're writing about building shelves, photograph one of the nails up close. Just put a white background (a sheet of paper works) behind the nail. Make sure you have enough light in the room and take the photo. Try a few at different angels and see which turns out best.

Scanner art is simple and straight forward too. Clip pictures from old magazines, advertising flyers. Turn them into a collage, arrange them on your scanner, use that same white sheet of paper over the top of your images before you scan. The white paper gives you an all white background, like a fill. Your image will be clean and ready to save for the web.

Hand drawn images will also work as scanned art. Draw a cartoon image. Use a real image, clip art, as inspiration. If you don't feel comfortable with your drawing skills write out words in your own handwriting instead. Scan your drawing or your written words just as you did for the scanner art. Don't forget the white paper as background.

Pixel art and ASCII art take some time to learn. Neither are really hard if you have some patience. Both will give you unique and creative images which no one else but you will have.

I have used all of these at one time. I continue to mix up ideas and create my own images. It doesn't take a lot of time or effort. Of course, there is some time to learn the sills needed. However, you're not making masterpieces to sell for millions, just an illustration for your blog.

Sagittarians are notorious in astrology for having the most attractive personalities of all the zodiac signs.

That's nice to read but I'd doubt it.

I skipped one point on the list, about humour and jokes.

1. We're inconsistent.

We know we told you last week we were taking up coding to learn more about computers. This week, we want to learn everything about growing our own succulent garden on the fire escape.

We're more than okay with not being just one thing so if you love a Sagittarius, you're getting a lot of different people wrapped up into one — lucky you!

3. We're very inflexible.

We're so sorry about that, but we don't want to make plans with you at 5:45 pm for a 6 pm dinner when we're about to get off work and all we want to do is go home and watch TV.

We value our alone time and we plan on it like we're in a relationship with ourselves. (Which we are.)

Sagittarians are very independent so don't expect us to adjust our own schedule to fit yours.

And don't mistake this trait for being introverted - we love plans, we just love when you make them 24 hours in advance.

4. We get into the deep philosophical stuff right away.

5. We're a little bit reckless.

6. And if you don’t love us, we move on fast.

We can drop people like a sack of wet, stinky laundry. We don't ever want to feel like we're in a relationship with someone who doesn't want to hear what we have to say or tries to tell us what to think.

Sagittarians have a fiercely strong sense of right and wrong and if you can't agree with us or at the least, empathize with us, we shut down.

7. But, no matter what, we're pretty optimistic.

Source - 7 Brutal Truths About Loving a Sagittarius