Change one thing in your life and you can change your whole world.

As you may know, I am working on the small business idea, self employment, after working as an office clerk, a department store cashier and generally being a nobody with a lot of wishful thinking. I always wanted to... write, for one thing.

I wasn't a total wash up. I wrote for websites, quite a few of them, but none felt like a real credit to me. Not being paid does that. They'd have anyone write, for free. Getting paid for your work gives it value and makes yourself seem validated too. You become part of the select group who are worth being paid for what you do rather than the rabble who do it just for the privilege of being published.

I don't mean to put anyone down. How could I when I have been right there among the rabble? I was glad to be published. I still am! I loved writing a weekly column. I did it for BackWash for more than three years. It was great as an experience and wonderful to learn to write weekly, to come up with something to say and get it out there. I wrote bits for LockerGnome, a prestigious site. But, I felt in some way that they were doing me a favour.

That was the wrong way to think.

I was giving them something of value. But, I didn't feel that way, then. If you are writing for a website, without getting paid, don't get stuck there. Don't roost on that shelf and think "well, this is ok... I'm getting published."

It's great that you have started but you have only just started. Move on, take another step.

That is what I'm doing. Today I was thinking about that. How my world and the way I thought before were small and narrow. I was thinking that I'm just a cashier, or I'm just someone from a small town, or I'm just some whatever. I didn't think I was worthy of taking on my own good ideas! That's so wrong and SUCH a waste.

Now I am moving again. When I first left Zellers I was delighted, then the lack of pay cheque set in. :D That was less than delightful. Still it took me awhile of fighting myself and the people around me who are used to the cashier mentality. My family still don't see me as someone who can move beyond those low paying jobs. They may say something nice when I want to hear it but they don't believe it, fully.

Anyway, as I meant to say when I started all this, as I am changing, stretching and trying to move ahead I find that my world is stretching around me. I am meeting people I would not have met when I was still looking down at what I wish I could do. I have ideas (more than before even!) and I'm not afraid to use them.

I wrote that before, years ago, before the divorce. I lost that for awhile. I'm back now.

Beware: Here there be Dragons. Or, for Skye - I am Dragon, hear me roar. ;)

This was a cute looking site: Zodiac Girlz - Sagittarius

You have the gift of seeing the best in people and are kind and caring to those who need your help. You have a lot of empathy - you can put yourself in someone else's shoes to imagine how they are feeling. Your optimistic attitude is contagious and helps friends to be more open-minded. You also love coming up with different ideas on how to solve a problem.

You are a Fire sign and with that comes impatience. You like to get moving and sometimes you fail to plan things out in detail. You also can be very sensitive and get your feelings hurt when friends don't view the world as you do.

Four Jobs You've Had in Your Life

Small business mastermind.
Magazine company circulation underling.
Creating real estate flyers.
General office nobody.

Four Movies You Could Watch Over and Over

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
The Princess Bride
Pirates of the Caribbean or The Pirate Movie
Moulin Rouge (maybe, I might get sick of it)

Four Places You've Lived

North York, Ontario in an apartment with massive echo ability.
Grew up in Scarborough, almost on Lake Ontario in an area that was Port Union once upon a time.
Farms in the Kincardine and Hanover areas before we settled in Scarborough.
The Dominican Republic and southern Illinois. Yes, that's more than four, I like to brag. :P

Four TV Shows You Love to Watch

I used to watch The Gilmore Girls, Judging Amy and that one about the blackjack dealer (Zoie?) who took over her sister's kids. But, now we only have one TV channel.
Sometimes I watch All My Children and Guiding Light, but a little goes a long way.
I like Cold Case cause it's a murder mystery with a lot of sentimentalness. I usually bawl at the end when they show the blonde lady seeing the ghost.
I've started watching Medium and The Ghost Whisperer which is almost the same show as the Medium. Medium may be better cause she isn't a skinny girl with a perfect life.

Four Blogs You Visit (Sort of Almost) Daily

HappyandBlue2.
The Skye's the Limit.
The Useless Men.
I have started reading FoilWoman too.

Four of Your Favorite Foods

Ice cream
Cheesecake
Lasagna
Cabbage Rolls, perogies, Mexican, Chinese and really fresh salad. I couldn't decide on just four.

Four Places You'd Rather Be

On a golden (though very comfortable) throne, ruling the world. Telling everyone how to do things the right way, or at least better. I would let HappyandBlue2 be an advisor since he's omnipotent. Skye would take all the pictures cause this meme was on her blog.
Driving a brand new car, road map on the seat beside me, a backpack on the floor of the passenger seat and a sleeping bag in the back seat. A man servant in the trunk.
On a beach picking up interesting pebbles and rocks. I don't care that it's winter.
In an abandoned house, finding forgotten treasures like posy bowls, weird art, iron keys and a sense of the people who built the house and spent their lives there. No creatures with teeth or claws.

Four Albums You Can't Live Without

I live without any albums. I own exactly none. Now, if you were talking software...

Four Vehicles You've Owned

I've only owned two - a 1993 Ford Tempo and a 1993 Toyota Camry. 1993 was a good year. :)

These are called posy bowls, as much as I can find a technical name for them. I have five now I think. An Aunt gave me my first one. Then I found one in an abandoned house, sort of abandoned anyway. Then I bought one at a garage sale. Then I found/ bought a couple which were at GoodWill last year. They had a few but only a couple were in good shape. I didn't want to pay $5 for one that was chipped.

They are bone china and made by different companies, like Royal Doulton. Most of mine are not Royal Doulton though, I can't think of the company name right at the moment. If I saw it I would have a flash of brilliance and know it right away. :)

These trilliums were on Ebay but I couldn't bid on them at the time. I still think about them. Trilliums are the flower of Ontario and one of my favourite wildflowers too. Someday my trilliums will come. :)

I pass by this old house each time I drive to Newmarket to visit my family. The house is on the outskirts of Bradford, on a hill, across the road from the Husky Truck Stop. This time I brought my digital camera and took pictures. I started just at the wooden fence surrounding the place. I couldn't see an easy way around it. After a few minutes I crawled under the fence in the driveway. I wish I had gone inside the house too, but I was alone so that didn't seem like a good idea. Not that anyone was there, there were no recent tracks in the snow other than my own. An abandoned house isn't safe and this one has been empty a long time.

The funniest thing that happened was losing my car keys. I had stuck them in my bra cause I had no pockets. At some point they had fallen out and I only noticed when I was back at the car, ready to unlock it and go.

My favourite picture is that one with the broken piece of chair. I love the house though, the look of it and how it sits on the hill.

So there's my little adventure and my first use of the digital camera. They turned out better than I expected. It was cold and my hands were a bit shaky but none of the photos are blurred or out of focus. I don't think they would have turned out so well if I had used my 35mm camera.

Comments:

happyandblue2
I like the pictures. And I just love old buildings, abandoned or not.
Unless they are haunted.
Hope you didn’t have too much trouble finding your keys, ha,ha..\

Laura The keys weren’t far from the fence I crawled under. Likely they fell out of my bra when I was making the undignified crawl under there. Luckily no one was there to take my picture.

I love old buildings, houses and etc. The abandoned ones are kind of sad but easier to access and explore, once you crawl under a fence.

They call it urban exploration, there are all kinds of websites from groups who explore derelict buildings and other buildings which people aren’t supposed to explore. A lot of the boys like to go through storm drains, I guess it would be interesting and have history too, but it doesn’t really appeal to me. I prefer the buildings. 🙂

Glad you liked the pictures. I have a bunch more. I’m looking for the best way to stick them up online. The files are ginormous from the digital camera. Blogger cried when I first tried to load them, as is. 😀