The sky looks like soft silver today. It’s sunny and windy and we’ve had the odd rain sprinkling down. I wish I could grab my purse, stick on my sandals and go for a drive. A short road trip. Maybe just to Barrie for coffee and book window shopping. Maybe a quickie burger stop too. At times I just crave a good hamburger with lots of pickles and lettuce and other assorted green stuff.
I never knew I was car addicted. Not until now, when it’s too late and the car is gone. I think it was 2 weeks ago yet it feels like two weeks ago, at least. I miss getting and going. I miss being able to satisfy my cravings for a coffee out, a burger or to run over (I didn’t mean to hit that squirrel) and fetch a bag of milk.
Oh well, soon I will be in car-less territory. The land of no parking and city drivers. It’s better this way, right?
Tomorrow night I am borrowing a car and will be meeting Jim in Newmarket. I’m a bit nervous, yet I’m looking forward to an evening out too. What to wear…? Clothing is a good idea. I have new blue shoes, garden shoes they called them at Canadian Tire. I don’t care. They’re light and airy on my feet. It’s like walking barefoot. Other the shoe thing I have no plan for what to wear. Likely it will end up being something clean and yet comfortable.
Before you read this you should know it’s from a girl’s site who believes in anorexia. They call them pro-ana. The sites usually have pictures of skinny women and haunting poetry and journals. Don’t read this without being ready to be haunted.
Most women live their lives in a state of starvation,
why should I be any different?
Quod me nutrit,
We turn skeletons into goddesses,
and look to them as if they might
teach us how not to need.
When I wake, I’m empty, light,
I like to stay this way,
free and pure, light on my feet,
For me, food’s only interest
lies in how little I need,
how strong I am,
how well I can resist,
each time achieving
another small victory of the will.
I, the hunger artist,
rarely disappoint my audience.
The difference between want and need
is self control.
but starving works.